No Good Deed

I find myself fast asleep on the day of my departure. Having a wonderful dream of making pancakes...naked. For those that don't know, cooking naked is awesome, and dangerous!! Only the most skilled of chefs can accomplish this feat. Anyways, so I'm having a wonderful dream about cooking pancakes naked, when, still in my dream, I hear a phone ring. So now, in my dream, I'm running around naked looking for this damn ringing phone...

I wake up and actually answer the damn thing. Its my friend and he's here to take me to the airport. I hop out of bed, and run into my living room. Its a mess. I've gotta unpack these boxes...oh well, next time I'm around. I grab my suitcase and head downstairs. Strange really. He's here doing me a favor, yet I'm strangely upset with him for interrupting my pancake dream. Regardless, we hop in his car and set off for LAX. He's making me drive? Bastard! I've gotten an average sleep of 2 hours a night for 2 weeks; thats not an exaggeration, I did the numbers, yet he makes me drive. FINE!

We arrive at the airport, I jump out, bid him farewell, check in my luggage and grab my boarding pass. I head over to my terminal to await my flight. I'm exhausted. In between meetings, making time for friends and making time for me, I have had no time to sleep. No, making time for me does not include sleeping. I have a connecting flight that I must catch, so I'm here 2 hours early; I hate being late. Today is a first for me. First time that I'm NOT flying Virgin Atlantic on an international flight. Also first time that I have a connecting flight when going to the UK. So lets see. Early, no sleep, non Virgin (WHORE!) Atlantic flight, and a connecting flight, which means.....

So my flight has been delayed an hour...which is funny because my lay over was for 1 hour 30 mins...no, I'm not really laughing. No worries right? I land in Chicago...my flight left 10 mins ago. Fine...no worries. When is the next flight to Manchester? Oh...there is none...no worries. I go down and have to rebook to London Heathrow and then from there to Manchester...no worries...I need sleep. I'm usually laid back and things don't get to me...but I'm starting to lose it. I can feel the anger boiling within me. Its taking a lot to keep it suppressed. I hate United...I really do.

As I sit there in my seat, thats all I can think...wait...let me take it back to the terminal. I love terminals! So many cute chicks. One...two...three...ok...maybe not many, but there were a few. All with accents. Gotta love that. The last time I saw a really cute chick in the terminal, I ended up sitting next to her on the flight...my father cockblocked me...thats a different story. I find my seat...none of the cute chicks I saw are sitting in my area...I need sleep. I really do. I just need to...wait...whats this...I have a whole row to myself?!?! Hecks yeah!! Last minute booking; first class full.

I sit there stretched out. About to drift off to naked pancake land...don't judge me...when I hear a voice. I look up...its a girl...cute too...shes American. We talk for about 5 mins, exchanging pleasantries. She asks me where I'm going, I respond Manchester. She says Aberdeen. She seems nice. No, I'm not gonna chat her up...shes American, and I'm very tired. But that doesn't mean I can't be polite. Hear that men!! You can be nice just to be nice! Don't have to pick up every girl you say hi to. Geez. Again, I lay my head down, again I hear her voice. She wants to move over and share my row with me. I look at who shes sitting next to...old ugly british guy...don't blame her...but its MY row!! Now, I hate doing good things, I truly do. Why? Because every, again, I'm NOT exaggerating, EVERY time I do something nice for someone the universe punishes me for it. Give a homeless guy money, cops pull me over. Read to burn center children, stung by a bee. Talked a friend out of committing suicide (no joke), got a bad haircut...right before I ripped my favorite shirt...right before my date cancelled on me that night...right before I got in a car accident.

I moved over and let her share my row...I'm gonna regret this. I fell asleep for the entire flight, missing the meals that the unattractive non-Virgin Atlantic staff provided. Woke up in London. Past immigration, past security, down to the terminal for my next flight to Manchester, and fast asleep again. Mmmmm.....pancakes....I hear a voice again...sounds American. I feel a tap on my shoulder.
"Hey, your flight to Manchester is boarding, you don't want to miss it"
"Thanks", I respond as I head over to board my flight.

It was the American girl. We talked for 5 mins on the plane, yet she woke me up so I wouldn't miss my flight. Its the little things that people do that really touch me and give me hope for the human race. As I flew to Manchester, I couldn't help but smile. Couldn't help but think of all the things that went wrong on this trip and how it all didn't matter because of the one thing that went right. Maybe my "No good deeds" rule needed to be re-evaluated. Maybe it wasn't the universe shitting on me, but just dumb bad luck. Maybe this was a sign that things were gonna change. I truly would've believed all this if they hadn't lost my luggage....bastards!!